The Gaze - Isabelle Legaspi

 

In my own way of challenging the male gaze, I thought that it was more fitting for me to hide or face away from it. It's comfortable for me to look at something else, like artwork, than to look at the camera or meet someone's eyes. 

Ways of Seeing by John Berger

“From earliest childhood she has been taught and persuaded to survey herself continually.”

When I read this sentence, it reminded me off my mom telling me not to sit with my legs open or bouncing up and down, while my brother who was also sitting like that wouldn’t get scolded as often. I was told not to do things a certain way since I was just a child. Learning how to sit, talk and walk a certain way, and be constantly conscious of what I do has become second nature to me.

“...spectator-owners were usually men and the persons treated as objects, usually women. This unequal relationship is so deeply embedded in our culture that it still structures the consciousness of many women.”

When I read this quote, I was compelled to check when this book was written. It was published in the 70’s and still holds true today. While today’s people have become more open-minded and equal, it doesn’t change the fact that there are still millions if not billions of people, cultures, communities and beliefs that share that same old concept.

Understanding Patriarchy by Bell Hooks

“Embracing patriarchal thinking, like everyone else around them, they taught it to their children because it seemed like a “natural” way to organize life.”

I grew up with parents with similar thinking. It was so natural until I started to think for myself. I constantly question why my brother gets to do anything he wants while I have less freedom to do the same. They didn’t get mad when he went to NYC alone when he was only 13, but I was 15 and couldn’t stay out past 5PM. It’s a lot of comparisons like that that angered me. I couldn't experience the things I wanted just because I'm a girl.

“As their daughter I was taught that it was my role to serve, to be weak, to be free from the burden of thinking, to caretake and nurture others.”

Being the eldest daughter of an Asian immigrant household can make me feel invisible sometimes. I am expected to do so many things, but they stop me as soon as I start using my voice, to think for myself.